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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27474154">You're Too Late I'm Afraid, This Flower's Already Dead</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxiousCrow/pseuds/AnxiousCrow'>AnxiousCrow</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Unrequited Love, asahi centric</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 19:21:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,351</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27474154</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxiousCrow/pseuds/AnxiousCrow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Two loves.<br/>Two flowers.<br/>And limited time.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Daichi Sawamura/Koushi Sugawara - Relationship, one-sided Asahi Azumane/Daichi Sawamura/Koushi Sugawara</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>You're Too Late I'm Afraid, This Flower's Already Dead</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emotions aren't easy. Anyone could tell you that. But liking two people? Two people who have been your friends for a while, since first year. That's harder.<br/>Asahi smiled fondly as he looked through the photos of himself and his two friends, Koushi and Daichi. He thought of how talented they are. How smart and pretty and caring and energetic Koushi is. And how Daichi is hard working and stern and strong and powerful. He stops his thinking. His odd thoughts bringing light to a deeper hidden thought.<br/>He loves them. In a romantic way. Something fond blooms inside of him. <br/>"I should tell them shouldn't I?" He asks out to an empty room. "I can tell them at practice." There's a sharp pain in his chest. "It will be fine.... I hope."<br/>He continues to scroll through the photos with a smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Practice continued as normal. Something felt off but no one knew what it was. That was until Daichi and Koushi embraced after. Daichi blushed and tried to exit the display of affection,<br/>"Kou, we haven't told anyone yet..." But the silver haired setter just smiled. <br/>"No better time than now Dai." <br/>With that they announced their relationship. Being congratulated by everyone. Coach tells them it better not affect their schooling or their playing styles.<br/>Asahi felt pins and needles prick his very being. It hurts to stand, he felt dizzy, he bowed, "Congratulations Sawamura and Sugawara." He says and runs out hand over his mouth. Not even registering that they called either by their family name. <br/>"Asahi!" Koushi calls out, "Oh my god is he okay?"<br/>"He looked like he was about to be sick…" Tanaka mumbles uncharacteristically quiet.</p>
<p>"I'm so stupid!" Asahi cries out into the empty street. "I should've known. They'll never love me, they have to have each other!" <br/>He puts a hand to his face as he feels hot tears dribble down his face. "Fuck… I'm so fucking stupid." <br/>He finds himself walking to a bus stop shelter as wind picks up. He cries as he sits on the ground pulling his legs up to the chest. "How could I be so stupid…"</p>
<p>Asahi didn't show up for school the next day. He called in and said he was sick. The lie tasted bitter and gross on his tongue. But he couldn't see Daichi and Koushi after running out like that. When both of them texted him worried about the end of practice he apologized and said he wasn't feeling good. As he lied he cried each word. Some sick beast drinking up every tear he shed. </p>
<p>When he did arrive back at school he was more quiet and anxious. He brushed his friends' worries off telling them he was still feeling a little sick and he was still just recovering. It wasn't a complete lie that time. He was still recovering but not from sickness, it was more of a heartbreak. His only complaint was that his chest hurt and he had a nasty cough. Well at least his story was more believable now.</p>
<p>This went on for a few days. That's when it came. All his terror and heartache and unrequited feelings. In one tiny, compact, baby blue petal. A petal he coughed up.<br/>Everything came crashing down. <br/>"No no no no." He thinks, "that's not what I think it is." <br/>He begins to cough again and he can't stop, something is stuck. He feels like he's choking. Something catches in his mouth, he takes it out. A dark indigo petal.<br/>"I have hanahaki…" he mumbles to himself, "No! It's not possible right? No one has been recorded of having Hanahaki in years! Asahi you idiot you're dreaming right? You're just scaring yourself!"<br/>He goes to look in the mirror, "Dreaming. This is just a dream. Nothing is going to be there." He pulls his shirt off with closed eyes. "This is just a terrible nightmare." He opens his eyes. Two petals imprinted on his skin. Baby blue and deep indigo. "Oh my god… Why me… I don't want to lose them…"</p>
<p>Asahi gets more and more sick. They can't do most of the things he loves doing anymore. It's harder to run, jump, and all those other things needed for volleyball. <br/>"Coach?" He asks before practice. The blond turns and asks what he needs. "As you know I've been pretty sick. I think I have pneumonia and I don't think my lungs will recover enough for me to play again…"<br/>The man's previous resting grumpy face shifts quickly, "Are you okay? How you gone to the hospital?" He worries for the student.<br/>Asahi gives a smile, and lies sweetly through his teeth, "Yeah I'll be okay eventually just not right now. But I want to give the Ace title to Tanaka. He deserves it so much. And if I can't play I can't be the ace."<br/>The coach pats the others back gently, "It's okay Azumane. And I don't want to see you get more sick so get yourself checked out. If you're playing or not."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tanaka was grateful for the title and role of course but he worries for his upperclassmen. The whole team does. But constantly Asahi is assuring them he's fine. <br/>The next tournament was chaotic, they had been doing quite well and as Asahi looked up he saw Daichi and Koushi embrace. With that domestic display a sharp pain stabs him in the chest and he stands up quickly and runs. He feels bile and what's most likely blue petals rise up his throat. As he enters the bathroom he coughs and coughs and coughs. He can barely catch him, breath as he feels like his insides are coming out. Blue petals soaked in crimson fall  to the floor as well as blood. He feels light headed and he doesn't see the door open or hear the panicked voice of his coach calling for someone to call the paramedics. <br/>"Asahi!" The man calls as he rushes in fully, "Come on kid, you'll be okay. We're going to get help." <br/>Asahi looks up with tears in his eyes. They're sore too. "I'm sorry-" he starts but is cut off by another ugly cough as more blood and petals flow out of his mouth.<br/>"Save your breath Asahi. We're going to get you help." <br/>Asahi nods and his eyes close. He feels so dizzy. And tired. He passes out with a panicked yelp from his coach as Takeda enters with a group of first responders.</p>
<p>When Asahi wakes up again he's in the hospital. A duo of nurses making sure he's stable. One of the nurses notices he's awake near instantly. <br/>"Azumane. How is your breathing?" He opens his mouth to respond but she cuts them off. "If you can't speak, nod for good."<br/>When he speaks his voice is hoarse, "I good as it can be…"<br/>She nods and writes it down. "I'm supposed to tell you about the options we have for you. As you know. You have Hanahaki. You have an option to get the flowers removed. This surgery is life saving."<br/>Asahi looks away from her. "Ma'am. As an 18 year old I do not want the surgery and I have the legal option to choose so."<br/>She looks at him in shock, "Azumane this is important."<br/>"I made my decision three months ago when I first found out. I would rather die loving Daichi and Koushi then never feel for them again." Asahi says firmly.<br/>She mumbles something inaudible and writes something down and walks out of the room. </p>
<p>About an hour or two later, Daichi and Koushi arrive. <br/>"Asahi what do you mean you're refusing treatment!?" Daichi whisper yells. <br/>Koushi puts a hand on his boyfriend's back, but looks sadly at Asahi, "The nurse called coach…"<br/>"I don't need it." Asahi looks away as Daichi practically turns red. "I know what your thinking but it's not your choice." His voice quiets down, "Besides it's too late."<br/>Koushi and Daichi freeze, "What?" They both pale and Asahi can only imagine what is and isn't going through both their minds.<br/>"I have a confession. And I doubt I'll make it through completely without coughing or emptying my lungs into this horrid sterile room." Asahi looks back at the two and he begins to tear up, "I've had Hanahaki for about three months…" there's a pause as he takes a painful, shaky breath. "I developed it after you two announced your relationship and I realized I liked the two of you." There's a cough. Then another. A whole fit of them. Two flowers, "Shit…" Asahi mumbles and wipes his mouth. "As you can see…" He stammers, "I'm already to whole blossoms… I'm not going to survive more than a week." He bursts into tears, "God blessed if I make it more then two whole days."<br/>"Asahi…" Koushi mumbles and hugs his friend. Daichi cries and practically crushes them both.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Koushi and Daichi nearly quit the team but the way the rest of the team reacted they both stayed. Karasuno didn't enroll in any tournaments and withdrew from the ones they had been in. Nobody questioned them. All of Japan knew. The first recorded case of Hanahaki in four years. The first death from Hanahaki in eight. Azumane Asahi, age 18, from the Miyagi prefecture.</p>
<p>A few weeks later Asahi's mother show's up at the Sawamura's doorstep. When Daichi answers he nearly cries.<br/>"Sawamura. I have something for you and Sugawara. Asahi wanted you to have it." She holds it out for him to take, "And I know it's hard for you and Sugawara. So I've made you both some food. I remember briefly your favourite foods, so I made an attempt." <br/>Daichi takes it and cries. She opens her arms and he falls into them. They remain like that for thirty minutes. The mother just gently comforts the boy as much as she can. Reminding him it's perfectly okay to grieve and that there are so many people who care about him.<br/>He thanks her and she tells him, he and Koushi are always welcome to come to her house and just talk.</p>
<p>Daichi returned to the living room where Koushi was. "Who was it?" He mumbles the question.<br/>"It was… Asahi's mom… She brought this for us…" He hands his boyfriend the box. "And food." He has a sad smile. Moving to the kitchen Daichi puts the food in the fridge. <br/>Koushi had already opened the box when he came back. In his hands, Daichi saw two familiar flowers. They were encased in resin. Perfect and whole. He nearly broke down right there and then again.<br/>Daichi moves to sit on the floor, back against the couch with Koushi next to him. Koushi hands him one of the flowers. Koushi leans his head against Daichi's, they don't say anything. They just cry and examine the box. </p>
<p>The next item pulled out is Asahi's phone. Unlocked. Nearly empty minus a single note to check the gallery. When they pull up the gallery they both begin to tear up, it's filled with photos of Asahi, Daichi, Koushi, the team… photos from first year, second year, and their third year. There's pictures from nationals and from their very first official match. They even find a few where Kiyoko is actually smiling, a rare sight but one always welcomed. </p>
<p>There are three crisp letters in the box as well.<br/>One for Daichi.<br/>My Love, Daichi.<br/>I'm so sorry you found out in such a way. I'm writing this pre-confession but I can only imagine you found out with me sick in bed coughing up whole blue blossoms or even in the hallway. But I do know if you're getting this letter I didn't make it or something.<br/>But that's not the point.<br/>I just wanted a final goodbye where I'm not coughing up blood. And tell you that you do not need to pretend to be strong or anything that there is a team (literally) of people who live and care about you. You're allowed to cry to feel upset. And knowing that I could've prevented it by just confessing hurts me. But I will never hurt as much as you will thinking your friend was in pain because of you. But it's fine. I dealt with it because I love you.<br/>Your flower is the blue rose. When I searched it up, it had a pretty neat meaning. "Achieving the impossible" That's pretty neat if you ask me. It doesn't even occur naturally. <br/>It's rare, unique, and perfect just like you.<br/>With love, Asahi</p>
<p>One for Koushi<br/>My love, Koushi<br/>If you have this I know I'm gone. Because my mom gave it to you or Daichi she's so sweet. Take care of her for me… I'm sorry I didn't speak up sooner. But I was scared. Nothing new there right? "Negativity be gone!" Right? And Daichi… watch him closely. I know he's going to pretend he's strong for you. But I know this is going to shake him more than he'll let you know. Your flower was the blue carnation. They serve as a reminder of the devotion and true love of the bride to their bridegroom and vice versa at weddings.<br/>This letter is my final personal goodbye. I love you so much. All your smiles, encouraging words, even the way you always know what set I wanted when we played together.<br/>Take care of yourself, I love you so, so much. Don't fall apart because of me. I know you're strong and nothing holds you back.  I don't want anything to ever feel like it's holding you back.<br/>With love, Asahi</p>
<p>And one for the two of them. Reiterating the things he said and having printed pictures of him, the both of them, and the team. And final wishes and the promise that they'll see each other again.<br/>Daichi and Koushi cry. They hold their letters close to their hearts and continue looking through the photos and rereading letters. Both silently promising they'd meet again.</p>
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